Ambiguously dexterous
Many years, a co-worker gave me a recipe. I’ve made the dish in question exactly twice. . .
because, even though I used a food processor, it took me an hour and a half.
A few years ago, I showed the recipe to one of my best friends—and she told me that she could make the same dish in half that amount of time.
That’s when I finally understood why I hate cooking—my limited fine-motor coordination makes working in the kitchen not a pleasure, but a time-consuming and onerous chore.
Call it fine-motor coordination or manual dexterity, as you will, but, whatever you call it, I simply don’t have it. Just about anything that I do with my hands takes me forever. I always needed an eternity to complete handwritten homework. Essay tests were a nightmare—I had to practically kill myself to write quickly enough to finish the test in the allotted time. I gave up mending my own hems a few years ago, even though I do beautiful nearly-invisible stitching, when I realized that mending a hem could take me as long as two hours. Back in my job-hunting days, I had to spend literally hours in front of a computer before an interview, trying to rev up my typing speed.
Frankly, one of the few advantages of working for my parsimonious current non-profit employer is that, since they can’t afford to pay decent salaries, they can’t afford to be too fussy, either—never once in the nearly five years that I’ve worked here has anyone tested my typing speed.
On the other hand . . .
One of my colleagues was scandalized when I told her that I was buying take-out for Rosh Hashanah (Jewish New Year), saying that she would never do such a thing for a holiday.
My former office buddy S., now retired, routinely cooked for her children and grandchildren, and, when she used to describe to me the dishes that she made, I felt as if I barely knew how to find a kitchen.
And now, at the women’s Tehillim (Psalm) group, nearly every Wednesday or Thursday, one of the women will ask another, “What are you making for Shabbat (Sabbath)?”
I live in dread of the day that someone asks me that question.
What am I supposed to say?
Take-out?
posted by Shira Salamone at 2:05 AM
8 Comments:
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yank, if you want to advertise, pay for it.
Naomi Chana, thanks for the suggestions.
You ain't kiddin' about the lying part. We rarely get invited because we rarely invite anymore--Hubster CPA's tax and accounting and college-accounting-instructor paperwork have so thoroughly taken over the apartment
that just clearing enough off the dining room table and chairs to make room for *2* of us to eat in dignity on Shabbat and Yom Tov has become a major chore. When our son is home from college, it gets even more interesting.
My favorite quick and easy meal is fresh fish. Just rinse it, dump it into a microwavable (sp?) pot, squeeze half a lemon onto it, added your favorite herbs and/or spices, add an inch or two of water, and microwave for roughly seven minutes or until you can "flake" the fish with a fork. There's something to be said for being able to eat a dairy dessert on Erev Shabbat.
Personally, I just do frozen food- quick, and I cook just enough to feel like I cooked (plus, I don't live in a town where there's kosher takeout etc).
I especially adore Ratner's frozen chocolate blintzes (though admittedly, they probably aren't filling enough for a full meal under most circumstances).
Mike, I hear ya--I'm pretty spoiled, living within subway range of kosher take-out. It would be a lot tougher for us if we didn't have that option, and had to do our own cooking at all times. We'd need a huge freezer, probably, if we had to make a monthly run to the nearest town with a substantial Jewish population to stock up on kosher food. We'd probably cook even more fish and smoked tofu that we cook now.
You owe no explanations. My Sis-inLaw says with a laugh on Fri Am that she still does not know what she is making. Obivously in the winter and one works outside the home that may not work so well.
My hubby cooks better than I but during tax season when he is working 20 hour days, I have done various things. The crock pot-its not just for cholent. Make a routine & repeat every week. That dish takes you nearly 2 hours b/c you do it once a year. If you did it every week, you would speed up, just like you did when you practiced typing b/f a job interview.
Finally cut yourself the same slack you'd give to a friend. If what you do is fine you you & yours, then thats the story. Forget about nosey co-workers. Nosiness is often disguised as "friendly conversation". Just don't buy in, or say oh, nothing fancy, just the usual" should get them to stop asking pretty quick!
Oy, another "tax widow," living through the annual three-month vanishing act. I go through the same thing with Punster CPA every year. 'Nuff said.
Since neither of us can do much more than boil water, it doesn't really matter who's cooking. (Pity the poor Punster--I taught him almost everything he knows about cooking. It was a classic of the teacher being one lesson ahead of the student.) But you're probably right about us getting into more of a routine. We're very bad about planning.
And I could just tell my colleagues that I'm making "nothing fancy, just the usual"--as you said, maybe an answer like that would discourage them from asking.
Thanks for the suggestions.
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